> 1/2 way there
Today, I hit day 55 of Andy Frisella’s 75 Hard Mental Grit program. And, as it turns out, my favorite podcaster, Mel Robbins, was in my ear this morning while I completed my outdoor workout talking about none other than building amazing habits that stick!
If, like me, you love science-based research, especially when it comes to creating healthy habits, you may have heard that creating habits in 21-days is a myth. In fact, I learned this morning that most habits take 66-254 days! And, according to a 2009 study that looked at 96 people over 12-weeks, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic… 66 days to be exact.
I have been consistently following Andy Frisella’s systemic mental grit program of 2 daily workouts, a clean diet, 10 minutes of non-fiction reading, drinking a gallon of water and taking progress pictures daily. And, with the exception of squeezing 2 workouts in everyday, it hasn’t been too crazy hard. After listening to Mel’s podcast today, I am convinced a large part of my success was the systemic prep work. It is definitely not because I am more disciplined than others. I truly believe it is because I set up my own SYSTEM for success before starting the 75Hard system with visual benchmarks I could check off, alternative behavior replacements, and rewards including texting others daily who are also doing 75hard with me.
For example, my previous morning routine was eating sourdough toast with peanut butter in the morning. So, I knew I had to find a replacement for that “behavior” before starting. Fortunately, I found yummy gluten-free sourdough bread from a local bakery and now have a slice of that and a hard boiled egg everyday instead. And, like many other humans who enjoy a nice glass of wine/cocktail to decompress after a long day, I knew I had to find a replacement for that routine (insert Topo Chico with lime in a wine glass) so I wouldn’t be tempted. And, I also told myself before starting that it was completely fine if I went on 2 longs walks for my workouts on days when a gym workout or a hot yoga class was not possible. I also created a system that had a daily reward… And, yes I will be vulnerable (thanks Brené Brown) and share it included placing a gold star after I checked off all of my daily 75 hard to -do’s each day. Yes, once a teacher, always a teacher!
And, now that I have pushed this system of behaviors through my neural pathways, the habits of working out, eating clean, drinking water, and reading daily are locked in. So, although I may only have 20 more days left of crossing off habits on my frig, I know I can sustain these awesome habits going forward. Yes, I will ditch the required selfie, and go down to 1 daily workout. But, the other habits are baked in… including a gluten-free diet and gravitating toward reading a book in addition to some mindless Netflix. Speaking of books, thanks to all the great folks and companies I have been interviewing with, I am now reading System Wise about ….you guessed it SYSTEMS and the importance of acting, assessing and adjusting while working collaboratively (and being vulnerable!) using evidence to support and scale improvement.. A.C.E!
So, thank you reader for allowing me to take a beat to celebrate my more than ½ checkpoint of success with you. It’s been a wild adventure filled with some major life hiccups ( job loss, skin cancer diagnosis to name a few) but one that has been so rewarding. And, yes life-altering.
If you want to change anything in your life, I would highly recommend finding a realistic system that supports your known triggers and includes daily rewards, even if those rewards seem silly, and yes, very elementary or odd to others. 🙂 If they work for you and support your goals, I am confident you too will find yourself more than ½ way there too.
Free Fall
Fourteen years ago, I came face to face with one of the most terrifying things I have ever experienced. I have always had a fear of heights, and after a few emergency landings, a fear of flying as well. And, here I was in a tiny tin plane, almost 2.5 miles up in the sky about ready to jump.
You may be wondering… why would I put myself in this situation?
- Was it to appease my best friend, who paid for everyone in her closest circle, to skydive on her bday?
- Was it because my husband and friends at the time had already committed to jumping?
- Was it because 3 people I had working on our new home at the time had overheard me talking about it and shared their unsolicited incredible skydiving experiences and why I should do it?
If I am being 100% honest with myself and others, yes, I suppose pieces of all 3 of these reasons propelled me to jump that day. But, upon reflecting, the biggest reason I set ALL logic and reason aside that day was something else…
I truly wanted to stare my two biggest FEARS in the face and in doing so, make them seem smaller and less scary. I wanted to be able to sit on my next Southwest flight for work, and rather than put my head in between my legs upon take off, ( yep, that was my protocol) be able to sit back in my seat, and remind myself I jumped out of one of these things and lived to tell about it. And, to remind myself that if I can do that, I can certainly sit in a much bigger, probably safer airplane, and get to my destination safely.
Fast forward to today…. the official first day of Fall (9/22/24). Fall is hands down my favorite season of the year, and it is also a time when change is inevitable and may I add beautiful. Fall is the time of year when leaves change colors everywhere, including here in San Diego, and the light just appears more magical and soothing. It is also the time of year when species, including monarch butterflies and ruby- throated hummingbirds migrate up to 2,000 miles to warmer locations. And, do so against significant risks from climate change, predation, and energy depletion. For example, Ruby-throated Hummingbirds have to make 18-22 hour non-stop flights over the Gulf of Mexico to reach safety. Imagine enduring that lengthy flight without refueling using those tiny wings? But, they do it every year and have an upwards of 80% migration rate!
And, yes, Fall is also a time when leaves fall to the ground. Daylight shortens, And, people experience disruption in their lives. I am now one of those people. I lost my job recently and I am also in a fight with Mother Nature to not lose both of my parents who are also in a state of free fall. And, unlike me 14 years ago, when I had a parachute and a confident Navy Seal attached to my back, this free fall is longer than 60 seconds. And, on many days, feels like that 60-second terrifying free fall period on repeat.
But, like the Ruby-throated hummingbird, I know if I keep my destination in sight, keep flapping my wings (my nickname is even Bird), and know warmer, more comfortable landings are in sight, I will keep flying. And, do so knowing incredible new adventures await me.
And, so on this beautiful Fall day, know that no matter what is changing all around you, know you are not alone. Relish in the beautiful changing colors, the smell of cinnamon in stores, the little lucky hummingbirds buzzing around you, and know they are all welcoming you and me into a new a season of life.
Happy Fall Y’all.
9-11
By default, September 11th will remain a day in history for paying respect and honoring those we love and have lost 23 years ago. It is also happens to be one of my best friend’s birthday. So, 9/11 is always a day I not only pause to reflect on where we are as a country, but a day I celebrate my big-hearted, incredible childhood friend. And, as it turns out this year, her birthday comes right after one of the most widely viewed presidential debates of our times. A debate that spoke of values, virtues and well… yes even dogs and cats.
But, this not a political blog. Nor, is it a blog on what transpired so tragically on 9-11. But, it is a blog to thank those I love and honor in my life for making me feel seen and heard and to remind everyone, even if it is not someone’s birthday, there are always small ways we can all lift people’s spirits up.
Which one will you choose today?
- Text a pic of a heart shape formed in nature to let someone know you are thinking of them.
- Snail mail a quick note to someone you care about. Yes, with a sticky stamp, remember those?(Mailing a letter takes a lot more effort than sending a quick text and people know that!)
- Pay a compliment to someone you know, or even better, to a complete stranger.
- Drop a flower(s) on someone’s doorstep. Did you know research has proven flowers benefit our health?
- Or, give someone the gift of TIME which is the one thing we all know we can never get back.
So, whether you choose to send a heart, mail a letter, compliment a stranger, or spend QT with someone you love today, it will matter greatly because you took the extra effort to make someone smile. And, I am confident we can all agree that making someone smile and feel special is good for everyone!
Carolyn Keeney 