Yes, but

If you could choose one word or symbol to represent 2020-2021, what would it be?

masks, change, or perhaps a toilet paper or related emoji?

The word I would choose is disruption. I think we can all agree that COVID-19 disrupted our way of life.

• Companies were forced to rethink, redesign, and reschedule, or worse yet, layoff employees.
• Teachers and students had to forge an entirely new way of teaching and learning.
• Individuals and families had to reorganize their entire ecosystems, work schedules, and behaviors.

Last night, I had the pleasure of reconnecting with some good friends I haven’t seen since COVID began. And, after some meaningful conversation about COVID, educational tech, and perspective, my guy friend Mike Lawrence, gave me a special pin that says.. Yes, and…

The premise behind the clever pin is to let the two simple words serve as reminders that there can always be something added to change and/or enhance the nature of a conversation or situation. Needless to say, this really resonates with me. But, in honor of taking something and adding to it, I would create another pin that also says. Yes, but…

Why? Yes, BUT?

Glad you asked. My biggest pet peeve is “It is what it is.” Everyone I know well can agree that these 5 words trigger me… and, not in a good way. They are usually uttered when that person has lost hope for a situation. To me, you mine as well say ‘all is lost’. There is nothing more you can do. And, for this, I always try to say… YES, but….

I will use our shared experience of COVID-19 to exemplify my point. COVID-19 shuttered the world and brought grief and devastating loss on a global stage.

Yes, but,

• we got to spend more time with our kids and/or animals at home.
• we got to get to know some of our neighbors better.
• we slowed down a bit or in many cases, a lot.
• we learned a new skill like gardening, cooking, or crafting.
• we spent more time outdoors and have a greater appreciation for wildlife.
• we updated and organized our living spaces…
• and, the list goes on and on…

Notice, I am NOT discounting the pain and horrific nature of the pandemic. But, I am reframing it into something that can be turned into a positive thing. Speaking of which, on June 15th, the state of California is scheduled to reopen! Most school-age children will be out of school for the summer and businesses will be able to once again open at full-capacity.

My enduring question is… can we internalize the lessons/take-aways from the pandemic and in doing so, alter our thinking a bit about how we react to future challenges? After-all, thoughts become things. And, the dialog we tell ourselves, and others, does impact our behavior and our subsequent actions.

So, I challenge us all to hit the pause button a bit when challenges arise in life and take some time to retrain and reframe our thoughts to say…

Yes, but.

So, the next time a relationship doesn’t work out, you can say (internally or externally) YES, but I learned ( fill in blank) from this person.

Or, if a job doesn’t pan out, we can say YES, but I learned (fill in blank) new skills or new things about myself I can take forward in a new experience. And, do even better next time.

A few words can go a long way in reframing our outlook. So, be sure to choose them wisely.